Sorry for the delayed post - we spent all weekend with family, so I didn't have time to blog...
I did end up POASing yesterday (Sunday) morning, right before I drove to my RE's clinic to have my blood drawn for my beta. Stark white. No sign of a second line. Sigh.
The blooddraw confirmed a negative.
That's two genetically perfect embryos that failed to implant.
By now I'm quite uncompromising at ignoring any symptoms, since I know they're equally likely to be caused by progesterone as a pregnancy. In hindsight, I had fewer twinges than the previous BFN cycle, and no nausea (also compared to the previous BFN). I have yet to identify any symptom that's specific to the two cycles when I did get pregnant, apart from super vivid dreams; however, I don't remember when those dreams started and it may not have been in the 2ww.
I've asked my RE to redo my immunology workup (we do this every few months anyway) to confirm my immune activity is quiet before we go into the next FET. Blooddraw is tomorrow morning. I'll wait for CD1 and then we'll immediately go into the FET with the last embryo from the first donor cycle. That's the saving grace with these cycles - quick turnaround in between.
Meanwhile, my donor arrives in town today and her retrieval (for her second cycle with us) will likely be later this week, so I'll start getting updates about her counts really soon. The timing works out well - we'll know how many genetically perfect embryos we get from this cycle before we transfer the last embryo from the first cycle, and hopefully that'll be reassuring.
Would sure be nice for one of these embryos to stick - it's so hard to know that everything worked except the one part my body has to be involved in.
For those of you who follow me on Twitter, thanks for all the twitter love yesterday. I had to ignore Twitter for most of the day since I was hosting family, but every once in awhile I'd peek at my @ comments and appreciated the support.
My husband and I started trying to have a baby in 2007. We ended up doing 5 rounds of IVF with our own eggs, miscarrying twice due to chromosomal abnormalities, and then moved to donor eggs. Our son was born in 2012. After two unexplained miscarriages trying for a sibling, we found a gestational surrogate, who carried our second son (2015) and our daughter (2018).
i'm so sorry. this completely stinks. i hope your RE has some good ideas about what went wrong and how to improve your chances of success. thinking of you.
ReplyDeletemo
Im so sorry to hear about the BFN. But I'm really glad you've got another perfect frosty waiting on you! What does your doc check on to make sure your immune system isn't acting up?
ReplyDeleteThe immunology workup looks at natural killer cell activation, and TH1:TH2 ratios. We checked in December (after a failed fresh transfer off the donor cycle), and everything came back completely normal.
DeleteI'm really sorry to read your news. Sounds like you have your plan in place for the next step. And still, this BFN must really suck.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts are with you.
Also really sorry to hear about your BFN. It all just seems so unfair. It's great that you're moving on to another cycle and staying positive. I hope this is your turn xx
ReplyDeleteI found your blog through google and I've been following as of this week. I'm sorry it didn't work this time. I'm doing my first IVF cycle right now and it's very refreshing to read other people's experiences. Even when it doesn't work out - it's so nice to read that you have a positive outlook on the situation. Inspiring. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteCrap :(. I'm sorry to hear this. I'm glad that you are able to move on really quickly and try the second FET. Thinking of you and hoping this next cycle is IT!
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about this - did you get your Vitamin D levels checked? This is a very minor thing compared to having good embryos obviously, but in case you're looking for other things that might help with implantation, my clinic recommends a Vit D level above 30 for implantation (this is based on a study done in Canada re: VIt D deficiency and implantation). I have zero idea if that helped me get my BFP, but it's one of those things that's really easy to check for.
ReplyDeleteBest of luck on this next round!
I've had them checked in the past, but may make sense to check them again. I do 5000IU every other day, so I'd be surprised if I'm low, but you never know...
DeleteThanks!
So sorry about the negative. I also had a negative of two genetically tested normal embryos last FET. So maddening! What more can we do? I hope your RE can give you some suggestions. Good luck with the next FET.
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry to hear this news. You've really been an inspiration to me and have really made a difference for me on this journey. Keep your chin up and just keep swimming towards your goal. I know you'll get there!
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for the BFN. :( That's great you get to move onto a new cycle so quickly though, and I hope they next round is the one for you.
ReplyDeleteThat really sucks. New to your blog, I'm struck by the rough road you have had so far, I'm so sorry for it.
ReplyDeleteMaybe your RE could add steroids and intralipids (I'm suggesting this because both are low tech, cheap,low risk interventions). Vitamin D deficiency can definitely play a role, because your immune cells tend to be more auto-immune prone when your levels are low, and it definitely can have a role in implantation, but with 5000 IU every other day, you should be ok, but best to get that checked out too. I was clinically deficient with taking close to 2000 IU/day.
The other thing I'd suggest is checking your thyroid function(TSH and autoantibody levels), if that has not been part of the workup yet, because that still remains the more common issues-- for example, 10 % of the total population has anti-thyroid antibodies, and that is a high number compared to some of the other things that are infertility risk factors.
At the end of the day, science can only go so far, and it can be incredibly frustrating when you realize every I has been dotted and and things are not working yet. Then its the fairy dust factor.
Best of luck with the next FET!
Oh, I'm on all of the above... I work a RE who specializes in immunological disfunction. Dexamethasone for the steroids, and Humira + Intralipids to manage my immune system (successfully, I will add). I've had TSH checked, and all the antibody tests. Apart from a compound heterozygous MTHFR mutation (minor, and common), everything was normal in my testing apart from the elevated natural killer cell activity.
DeleteAs far as we can tell, everything was just fine, and we just had bad luck with two perfect embryos not implanting over two transfers. But we'll double check to make sure, and keep rolling the (very expensive) dice...
Thanks for the suggestions, though, and for the good wishes!
Wow. You are amazingly well managed. Best of luck, keeping fingers, toes and everything crossed!
DeleteOh no Brave IVF girl!!! This is truly sad news!! I am so so sorry...
ReplyDeleteI am so very sorry. Thinking of you!
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry to hear of your BFN. It truly sucks, especially when the embryos are perfect. The same thing happened to me with our first fresh and then FET cycles, and it was so hard to believe. How can it not work when they're perfect? But - we just fall on the wrong side of the odds sometimes.
ReplyDeleteHang in there. Again, I'm really sorry :(
I'm so sorry. :( These things never get easier do they?
ReplyDeleteBless your heart I know how hard that is. ! I pray all will work out.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for the BFN - that sucks!
ReplyDeleteCatching up on blog reading-I'm so, so sorry. Thinking of you.
ReplyDelete