Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Life goes on

Not much to report since the last update.

I ovulated more than a week later than usual (normal is around Day 18 for me, and I ovulated around Day 27 or 28). Glad I kept up with the OPKs -- I was sure I'd just missed it.

For those wondering why I was using OPKs -- my doctor suggested it so we can better estimate the timing for our eventual IVF. After I get my period (likely mid-late next week given my short luteal phase), I'll get my calendar for my pre-IVF-cycle month. Which means OPKs again, and then starting estrogen 10 days after I ovulate, along with Ganirelix. Then after I get my period again, the actual IVF stim cycle starts.

If I have another extra long cycle next month, my IVF cycle month won't start until possibly early November, so I'm hoping it's more normal and we can start at the end of October. (*sigh* at one point I was thinking mid October, but seems unlikely now...)

My Humira hasn't started, since they want to time it with the beginning of my next cycle, and I'm actually looking forward to it since it gets rid of my allergies. (Silver lining, I suppose!)

One thing I didn't mention in my last post is that my doctor brought up donor eggs as the 'quick fix' answer to our infertility. So that's been floating around my head a lot. I really want to be pregnant (again), so I had previously told my husband in a casual conversation that I would rather be pregnant than use a gestational surrogate with my own eggs (not that that's a possibility, since my eggs are the problem, not my ability to carry a pregnancy).

It's definitely something that I'm open to, but I am having trouble reconciling myself to it. Which, after all, is why we're still trying to make IVF with my own eggs work. (And yes, the change in protocol is making me hopeful as so many of you pointed out in the comments on my last post.)

Hopefully we won't have to cross that bridge, and this IVF will be the one.

It's far enough away that IVF #3 is not something I constantly think about. I'm keeping myself busy -- travelled for a week and a half (partly with my husband), and am about to start a consulting project for a few weeks which should be fun and pays well.

On another note, it's incredibly hard to read pregnancy updates from people who got pregnant after I did and are now more than halfway through. I'm really happy for them (and you, if you're one of those lucky women), but it hurts, and it reminds me how close I'd be if my pregnancy hadn't ended the way it did. It's sort of like when you have a group of friends and everyone just grows apart as they get older and start having different life experiences. It's awkward, but it's not personal, it's just the way things are.

5 comments:

  1. saying it's awkward but not personal was a great way of putting it.

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  2. hey there C - i'm glad you have a concrete plan and time frame for #3. fingers, toes, everything crossed for you that oct-nov gets here very quickly and that this protocol is the magical one for you. hang in there :o) xoxoxoxo.

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  3. i really hope this next one is your cycle!!! you're in my thoughts/prayers.

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  4. I hope that you don't have to cross that bridge, either.

    Your last paragraph I can relate to so well. It was so interesting to read someone else's thoughts that were so similar to my own (in a post from the same day).

    (((HUGS))) You've got another shoulder to lean on this journey.

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  5. Don't you worry yourself at all. Each time they do a cycle, they learn a ton about your body.

    You know what my first RE told me? Donor eggs. And right this minute husband is hollering at me to get off computer to take my non DE daughter to bed.

    All that said, I chose not to purse it anymore. It is a long, hard process to choose either IVF again or DE.

    We have a lot in common. Please count me as one of your cheerleaders now.

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