Waiting

It's been awhile since I've blogged, so I figure I'm overdue for an update.

Our donor's genetic consult and psych consult are complete, as is our psych consult. We're now waiting for her medical screening appointment to be scheduled - the nurse guessed it'll be the first week of September. Shocking that September is so close - it sounds so far away but when I look at a calendar, it's right around the corner.

We have a few infectious diseases to get re-tested for (thanks, FDA), and I have to get my immunology bloodwork redone to see how it's looking, but otherwise are on hold.

Checks have been sent for all the donor payments, and I've had the financial consult for the IVF cycle. Due to the DQ Alpha partial match, we'll be transferring one embryo at a time. Annoyingly, that means we aren't eligible for the shared risk plan at our clinic. We meet every other criteria, but the "following doctor's recommendations, including transferring two embryos at a time". It's extra annoying, because it's in everyone's interest that I transfer one at a time.

With a partial match, 75% of 2-embryo transfers will result in at least one match, which means my immune system will flare up and reject the embryos. And in a shared risk plan, I'd get 90% of my money back if I didn't end up pregnant at the end of all the transfers.

With a single embryo transfer, only 50% of my transfers will result in a match. So I feel like I'm being punished for having this extra information, which in fact helps everyone be successful. Grr.

I'm still waiting for AF. CD 42... I think it's a reflection of the state of my ovaries, honestly. Good thing we decided to move on...

Once the donor passes her medical screening, we'll both go on the pill for a few weeks and then start stims. Depending on immunology, I may do Humira shots again in September.

My nurse's best guess is that we'll do a retrieval around mid-October. I just want to get started so I know we're on a path.

My puppy is keeping me busy. We started puppy class and took her to a puppy social today which was really fun. I'm still a little dubious about the whole puppy thing - she's so much work. I'm looking forward to being past the puppy days but wish she'd stay this size.

Sending loving thoughts to C who's dealing with a BFN from her FET.

Progress

We found and confirmed a donor! She still has to pass a psychological screenings and then a medical screening by our doctor, but we're excited to be making progress.

We found four donors we were excited about - three with one agency - but one was in cycle, one was just about to be confirmed by another couple, and one won't travel from Southern California. Hopefully it's fate. :)

I've had a few tears about DE, but a lot of my unhappiness is assuaged by finding a donor I am (and we are) enthusiastic about.

I don't know yet what cycle timing will be, but it's top of mind for both of us.

Well, not entirely top of mind. Because two days ago we picked up a golden retriever puppy and she's been consuming our attention (and sleep cycles...) The first day was really overwhelming, and I was unexpectedly really sad - I think because I never thought I'd be at home with a puppy before I was home with a baby.



In other IF-related news, I met DeadCowGirl last week and had a fabulous time. I see doggy playdates in our future. I've really enjoyed meeting all the twitter/blog women I've met in real life - very worthwhile.

Decision made

We're done trying to use my eggs.

I just can't fathom going through the same motions, hoping for a different result. At about $13k a pop (drugs + retrieval + travel). And even with "better" results, the chance we'd end up with one good embryo at the end of the year is very slim. (1 out of 4 embryos, or 1 out of 3 blasts, are genetically normal at my age, so our odds are not good when we typically get 1-3 eggs per retrieval...) And if we get to the end of the year and have no good embryos, then we'd be 6 months behind in starting the donor egg path. We've been at this 4 years this month, and we are past ready to have kids.

I'm disappointed, of course,, but I've known this was likely for quite a while. I was really sad on Sunday night about losing my genetic contribution, but finding profiles I'm excited about goes a long way to reassure me.

I now have database access with all the egg donor agencies recommended by my last two clinics and spent some time over the past few days pulling profiles that looked interesting. Some even capture the things I feel I bring to the table genetically.

This weekend, my husband and I will go through the profiles I've collected and figure out which ones appeal to both of us.

For those interested, the things I'm looking for, in priority order, are:

1) Intelligence/academic performance
2) Interest/talent in the arts, preferably music
3) Attractive (totally subjective - my husband and I don't always agree!)
4) Brown hair
5) Looks like she could be related to me
6) 5'5"+

I know it takes awhile to process a donor, even after we choose one, so my guess is we'd be cycling in early October? Roccie? Lisa? What's your experience? We're obviously keen on getting started as fast as possible.

In other news, I had a great time meeting Jamie on Tuesday. We went to the Jelly Belly factory in Fairfield - it's in between where we live, so made for a fun place to meet up.

Zero

Those of you who follow me on twitter already know that yesterday we were told our lone embryo had failed to develop into a blastocyst.

Grr.

Not surprising, knowing the statistics on how these things work, but certainly disappointing.

And it's making us think very very seriously about stopping any attempt to use my eggs and just go straight to a donor.

We can get our money back for the unused embryo banking cycles and if we choose, apply it to a donor cycle (or get a refund and work with a local clinic for the donor cycle so I don't have to travel).

I'm leaning that way right now, and my husband is comfortable with whatever I decide (although we had an emotional chat last night that showed how frustrated and impatient he is with the journey; as am I!) I mean, we can get $10,000 back from our current plan, and avoid spending $10-$15k on meds for the two cycles. That $20-$25k goes a long way to paying for a donor cycle (likely $30-40k depending on the donor fee.)

If we decide to start the donor process, we would move as quickly as possible, so hopefully cycle in September or October. I'd love to hear agency recommendations from anyone on the West Coast - we'd either be cycling in the Bay Area or in Vegas.

ps: my Vegas post got to #14 on Google for a search on "vegas ivf", although it's currently at #16 and will likely sink from there. Hee! Thanks for all the nice comments on it - I'm glad it's helpful for folks.

What to do in Vegas in between IVF appointments

I just spent 9 days (2 + 7) in Las Vegas while undergoing IVF 5.1. I'll be back in August for 5.2, and October for 5.3. Previously, I'd only been to Vegas to go to the Strip, and had never explored the city or the area.

Since I'm not the only person who goes to Las Vegas for IVF treatment, I thought I'd document some of the fun things I found to fill up my days while I was there. After all, a wandy appointment only takes about 30-45 minutes including bloodwork, so there's a lot of time to fill...

I also want to call out a few tweeps and bloggers who helped me with recommendations and meetups and even meds! Ana kindly drove in and met me at my hotel for coffee and great conversation. Stephanie shared some meds she no longer needs. Asano gave me tips on hikes, while I'll investigate when I'm there in October -- it's just too hot in June/August for that sort of exercise!

Daytrips:

Primm Fashion Outlets -- There are two outlet malls in Las Vegas, but I'd skip them in favor of a daytrip down to Primm, which is right on the border with California. It's about a 30 minute drive from the Strip. The mall itself is kinda scuzzy, but there are great outlets, including a Williams-Sonoma outlet and a Neiman Marcus outlet! (Very dangerous...) The outlets in Las Vegas proper have good stores, too, but not the two I listed. Of the two, the one at the north end of the Strip seems to have a better store selection.



Hoover Dam -- I'd never been, so I figured it would be a good excursion for one of the days with no appointments (since you want to get there early to beat the crowds and the heat). I showed up around 10am and was able to get the last ticket for the 11am long tour (one of the benefits of being solo!) It's an interesting tour, and I found the trip to be worthwhile. It is extremely hot, so plan accordingly. Only takes about 40 minutes to drive there from the Strip.

Restaurants:

Burger Bar @ Mandalay Bay (actually Mandalay Place) -- Great burgers, and accommodated my no-bun request (however, they aren't sophisticated enough about gluten-free to offer lettuce-wrapping as an alternative). There was a long wait for a table when I arrived around 1:30, but I was able to sit immediately the bar (another advantage to being solo). I had the Kobe burger and it was very tasty.

Lotus of Siam -- This Thai restaurant is reputed to be the best in the country, and it was amazingly good. We ordered all unfamiliar dishes (apart from mango with sticky rice) and enjoyed them all. It's in a little strip mall (heck, most of Vegas off the Strip is in a little strip mall), northeast of the Strip.

Julian Serrano @ Aria -- I loved this tapas restaurant. They have a special menu that lists which allergens are in which dishes, very helpful for avoiding gluten (though I was very surprised at some of the dishes they claimed had gluten - roasted marcona almonds?), and very very tasty food. This was another restaurant that couldn't seat me at a table but I was able to sit at the bar and order immediately (ended up ordering with two ladies who sat down at the same time, which worked out great as we could try more dishes!) The Huevos Estrellados were my favorite dish - very simple and very tasty. THe sauteed padron peppers were also great. I will definitely go back here next visit.

Lazy Joe's Fish & Chips -- Not in the same league as the others, but I want to call it out because it's the first fish & chips place that's also gluten-free! I was even able to order onion rings safely. It's good food, but since everything is fried, it's pretty heavy. Fun as an indulgence - I'll likely go back for fried chicken since I haven't had that in 3 years. It's not far from Dr. Sh.er's office.

Sammy's Wood-fired Pizza -- Another restaurant I visited specifically because of their gluten-free options; in this case, gluten-free pizza. I like their (new) gluten-free crust, but they seem to have trouble sufficiently cooking/heating the toppings without overcooking the crust. My crust was great, but the toppings were a little cool (I like my pizza cheese browned). The entire staff at the restaurant was very interested to hear how I liked their crust (I guess they changed providers recently, and the new crust is very different from their old crust) - I appreciated their interest and their friendliness. I went to the location in Henderson, before I went to Hobby Lobby (see below), but there are a bunch of locations in Vegas.

Other food-related places to visit:

Top Notch BBQ -- Reputed to be the best BBQ in Las Vegas, Top Notch operates out of a food truck parked at Plant World on W Charleston. Check twitter for the latest, but I believe they are there every afternoon from 12-6 except for Sundays. I picked up a ribs and pulled pork combo dinner that came with two sides and a slice of Texas Toast (which I skipped), and it was enough for two meals. And super yummy!

SnowONO Shave Ice -- My favorite thing about going to Hawaii is getting a shave ice every day (or more than once a day...) Oddly, I haven't had any luck finding shave ice in the Bay Area, so I delighted to find the SnowONO Shave Ice truck in Vegas. Check twitter for schedule and locations - I ended up visiting them at the fresh52 farmers' market.

Farmers' Markets:

Saturday and Sunday mornings are the fresh52 markets (different location each day). I went to the Sunday morning market (to get my shave ice from SnowONO) and bought some product and a yummy, wheat-free oatmeal/peanut butter/chocolate cookie from The Land of Sweets.

Tuesday and Wednesday late afternoons are the Las Vegas Farmers' Markets, also different location each of those days.

The markets all tend to be on the outskirts of town, so you'll have to figure out which is most convenient for you. I didn't mind driving around, since I wasn't really on a schedule for most of the visit.

Specialty shopping:

Scrappin' Time -- this is a scrapbooking store. I don't actually scrapbook, but I do various crafty things and often enjoy browsing. This one is extremely focused on scrapbooking, so if that's your thing, you'll love it.

Hobby Lobby -- it's a giant store in the vein of Michaels or Joanne Fabrics. They have a large scrapbooking/card making area and I found a ton of really cool crafty stuff.

Groceries:

I'd recommend buying groceries after you see your hotel room, so you have an idea of what sorts of things will be easy to prepare. (e.g. do you have a pot big enough to be a pasta pot? how about a skillet to fry eggs?)

We went to the Whole Foods at Town Square after arriving in Las Vegas. I can't recommend it - it's the worst Whole Foods I've ever visited. Looks picked over, and the produce is poor quality. The only good thing is that it's close to the airport and the Strip. Next time I think I'll drive to the one in Henderson.

fresh&easy is now in Las Vegas, and would be a good complement to Whole Foods for the basics.

Places to stay:

The two places I've tried so far are the Wyndham Grand Desert and the Signature at MGM Grand. I much preferred the latter, although it's slightly more expensive.

The Wyndham is a timeshare condo hotel. The kitchen in the 1 bedroom condo I stayed in was totally adequate, and reasonably stocked with pots/pans/dishes. The condo itself was adequate - nothing special. Not particularly inspiring for a week's stay. If you call down to the front desk you can get the wifi access password, but the service is pretty spotty. DVD player in the room and HBO. There are multiple pools on the property, some are adult-only, which is nice. It's all self-parking, and on weekends it can be very difficult to find a spot in the evenings - I think the place gets overbooked for the number of parking spots. It's two long blocks off the Strip, and there's also a shuttle that takes you to the Strip (I never used it).

The Signature at MGM Grand is much more stylish. The mini-kitchen in the junior suite isn't quite as functional as at the Wyndham, but it's still fine for cooking simple meals. It's also not as well stocked with pots and pans and stuff. (Although I will note that I booked through a third-party instead of through the hotel, so it's possible the "official" rooms differ.) Parking is all valet (unless you want to park way over at the MGM Grand's self-parking, which I wouldn't recommend). Free, but I tipped $2 every time I picked up my car - usually took 5 minutes to get my car. The pool's (one per tower) are small, and aren't open every day, which is weird. But you can use the MGM Grand's pool if you're into that more social/party pool scene. And Wet Republic is right behind Tower 1 (with associated loud music until 7pm on the nights it's open). There's a resort fee which gives you wireless access - I found the service to be good, although not super speedy. Certainly adequate for checking email and stuff like that. There's an indoor hallway that takes you to the MGM Grand where you can get out to the Strip. It's maybe a 10 minute walk from Tower 1 to the Strip through the hotel.

I booked both using vrbo.com, saving a bunch of money off list price.

I'll continue to edit this post after my next visits.

One

We actually found out it was one on Friday morning when the nurse coordinator called. But today we got an email from the lab, confirming the embryo is still going strong and they biopsied the cell for CGH today. They'll freeze it on Wednesday (day 6 since they want it to be a blast and we just took one cell out...)

Oddly, Dr. Sh.er told my husband on Thursday that he got two eggs, but the lab report this morning said there were 3. Apparently only one was mature (this is not uncommon for us, and not surprising given this uneven cycle).

I'm home as of Friday - doing lots of loads of laundry and enjoying not-105-degree weather. Waiting for my period, which should be imminent, then I go back on BCP in prep for IVF 5.2.

Happy 4th of July (slightly early over here on the west coast. :)

Two

Egg retrieval was this morning. We got two eggs. For this following along, that's one more than originally expected, but only half of what we were potentially tracking as of Monday (tho we knew the two small ones probably wouldn't catch up enough).

Retrieval itself was fine. The facilities aren't as nice as at my previous clinic, but not in a major way. Eventually got the IV in my forearm where I like it, after the vein blew in my elbow. :p this clinicdoesnt have the cold numbing spray that my previous clinic used pre-IV but I was a big girl and did fine.

Went to Lotus of Siam for lunch - reputed to be the best Thai restaurant in the country, and it was pretty damn good. Then back to the hotel for a nap. (I'm going to write a post soon about what to do in Vegas when you're here for IVF, with reviews of restaurants and hotels and stuff...)

They gave me a progesterone shot to help bring on my period - they said 2-10 days, but since my luteal phase is naturally short, I suspect I'll be at the shorter end of the range.

Once my period starts, I go back on the pill. And in late July start up the same regimen for retrieval #2. I'm going to do acupuncture (didn't with 5.1 due to travel) to see if that helps with ovarian response.

We did decide to do three retrievals - thanks for weighing in. It came down to: this was designed as our last ditch effort to use my eggs, so we may as well get what we can to give us the best chance of having at least one normal embryo.

I've been wanting to try the Blu.eprint juice cleanse, and got a grou.pon- typ deal for it a month or two ago, so I'll try that sometime in July - figure getting rid of all these drugs in my system canny be a good thing.

Fertilization report tomorrow. Since this is 1 of 3 somehow everything seems less important, so I'm not particularly stressed about any of it. Silver lining, I guess.

I mean, I really hope this works and we get at least one normal embryo. But if not, at least it's a clear sign to move on to DE.

Thanks for all the well-wishes!